The givens:
-Welp, its the dawn of the dark doobie again, boys. Weed! You know I hate it! Here's what the doobie will make you do: it will make you sit around and fart and think phish is good. Yep you look real cool: squinty and tie-dyed with a half choked on bag of cheese puffs hangin out your bong hole! Hang 10 bra!
-Babies and anyone who ever even looked at one on purpose for longer than 30 seconds. Theyre sick bags of blubber that drool and shit on everything. Its like people become stupider the second they look at one. Babies and intelligence go together like shit and strawberry shortcake. Don't bother having one if you hope to further your education or have an intelligent conversation THAT ISNT ABOUT BABIES EVER AGAIN!
Some things I might be on my own with and also prove that I'm a total jaded bitch:
-When people think like a dirty chair is a family heirloom just because their dead mom sat in it. This older lady from work brought a SICK, grey, puffy, arm-less, stuffing coming out, broke down ass swivel office chair and constantly comes back to the office questioning who "messed with it" when in reality no one else will sit in it cuz she smells weird and everyone thinks her smell will suction into the gross puff and then sponge out back onto you if you sit on it. Trailer park heirloom!
I HATE SO MANY THINGS!
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