So I'm on the free section of craigslist like every 15 minutes. Having just moved into an apartment I'm trying to find a table, chairs, couch, etc. Sometimes there's good stuff- sometimes not. Sometimes people realise all of the sudden that they're in Oregon and SHOULD NOT THROW ANYTHING AWAY EVER. On those days a good 99% of the posts are for free wood chips, free river rock, FREE DIRT. Really? Free dirt? Are people falling for this?
Hmm no sofas...oh wait, honey, come check this out. There's a big dump load of sifted DIRT a few blocks away! I'll fire up the subaru!
They come home with dirt because they get the craigslist psychosis. I know- it's happened to me. Actually just now I had a mild episode. I considered getting some free brine shrimp.
Hmmmm no dining tables, oooh brine shrimp! CUUUUUTEEE!
I even clicked on it.
Maybe it'll tell me what they eat. I have that big glass bowl I could...
Then something clicks.
Waaaaiiiiitttt BRINE SHRIMP!?!??!
I almost fell for it. I guess the slimmer the pickin's the more desperate we become.
Maybe I could find a table in the barter section. The owner could be a brine shrimp enthusiast. Ya never know. I'm gettin' desperate for trash. 'Fore I know it- I got the psychosis.
This phenomenon has got to be conneceted to the other disorder I develop that I call "free shit mania".
Say I'm riding my bike down the road and I find two alright free piles in a row and get some good stuff I've been needing. Then I get on this high and go get (steal) my boyfriend's car and start driving around looking for free stuff, and that's ok...for now. But if I find one more GOOD free thing, something in me snaps. The lines get blurred. I start seeing things on people's porches and thinking I can have them. I see a nice Saab and start drooling. Wonder if I could.... Nah. But it's by the CURB!
I see a tiny little man and think I can throw him in the trunk. I'M NOT LYING! One time I thought I could HAVE a HUMAN! He was by the curb! That's fair game! It's the mania.

Hmm should I? Could I? WHOA HOLD THE PHONE! BRINE SHRIMP!

Craigslist Farm Section: Yep. Betta stay in school!

Beautiful Arabian Quarter Horse Mare 7 years old shown and competed we call her (spinner) *registered* under (Misads Spinner) 14.3 hands born may 3, 2005 has a nice muscly boddie and pretty big but and a Arab baby face that makes you want to hug and kiss her but this is not a horse to be babied! she will take add vantage of YOU!! shown hunter. dressage,bareback,hunter jumper, pony club but would be a good cow horse, barrel, gaming ANYTHING!! moves like a ballerina you can watch for hours gorgeous extenuation! can go for hours on hours!  has a very nice and stedie head set! and is very gentle on the mouth if you have to strong of hands she will yang her head back and forth till you give it back! fly's over jumps little spooky very confident horse! loves people! has been shoes once but mostly goes bare foot nice feet! she has ability to do ANYTHING!!! i do not have time for her she is my love but i have school! :(

 He will put some nice colored babies on the ground
Has both down and will breed.
She is a horse you can just pull out the pasture and jump on bareback. She was Bred on Easter Sunday to a Black stud that has DockBar Bloodlines.
 He is not spooky and does not booger hunt
Mom is a Jack Russell I don't know what the dad is, they look like black mouth cur. The mom is also available, she was a stray that my son drug home, because he felt sorry for the dog. He realized that she was pregnant and someone through her out beside the road.

Uh oh! He gat onea my goils!

Alpaca Male - Quality - Price Reduced

Jasper has has herdshire quality bloodlines and characteristics. His DOB is October 11, 2008. Jasper's dam is Miner Creek's Bianca, a beautiful , 18 micron, 15/16ths Peruvian female ( ARI#30670488). Jasper's sire is Golden Pine Alpacas Rainman (ARI # 20010416). A recent writeup indicates that "Rainman is the product of the VERY finest-fleeced Hemingway dam Bobbie Ann and Accoyo El Nino, whose density and fleece character are legendary." Have fiber analysis for Jasper- 20 microns. Although I cannot say he has proven, from observation I believe he has bred my one of my girls. Call for questions 360-448-9260

BOAR BOE BRED TO NUBIAN BUCK

3 yr old Boer/nubian doe goat, red w/ white, previously kidded easily. May be currently be bred, she's been in with my registered fullblood Boer buck for about 4 weeks. $150 firm

Craigslist Farm Section=The Best!!

"I would consider trading some hay for him"

FREE NUBIAN DOE

Mazie is 3 yrs old. She has a breech still birth baby inside of her. I can't get it out because it is butt first and her cervics is, either; no longer dialated or never was dialated?! I have put a lot of money into her the past two months I have owned her. Her previous owners did not take care of her. If someone is welling to take her to the vet and get a c-section you can have her for free! She is a good goat. 

REAL CRAIGSLIST

hi, I am a single 33 years old male, I live i california , and I am interested in meeting a blonde girl from russia, I would like to establish a relationship that leads to marriage, if you areinteresteed please email me a picture, an dI will answer all emails, please be serious about moving to USA.

REAL CRAIGSLIST: oh no I've been CONED

hello pretty russian ladys - 47 (greenville s.c/ usa)

hi ladys my name is gary. i live in greenville s.c/usa. i,m looking for a nice russia wife. american women are nothing but drama queeens. no not looking for a slave. i,m looking for a true partner in life. but i have a few rules. you must have a picture and a phone. i have been coned to many times.

MEN ARE SICK (cept my boyf and friends)

men are so fucked!!!! they are so pathetic! they shave their sick hairy chests so there's sick stubble and puff them out when they pass by a female on the street like pigeons and try to act tough like gypsy teens!  they think their lives are over because they are balding and realise that all the time they were trying to "play" women and wearing gold chains and smoking bongs and making a bed out of pizza boxes and making nice girls feel like shit because they have periods and fat asses that now it's too late and they are too embarassed to admit it so they get a girl they tormented in high school to marry them or start searching russian craigslist thinking they can actually get a thin healthy beautiful educated russian woman to date them without sending them any money for a plane ticket to come to america by writing ridiculously misspelled ads claiming they own a small business! people! i bought a plane ticket to russia and a 2 month visa and it costed me like $500. i am poor, people! i have eaten only kale and sriracha sauce for weeks on end to afford things like this! this is real. i read these on russian craigslist. i am sorry i cannot stop talking about these things:

HI MY NAME IS ROBERT AND I AM LOOKING FOR A WOMAN TO MARRIE I LIKE TO RIDE MY HARLEY AND GO FISHING HUNTING AND COOKING OVER A CAMP FIRE I HALFR A 6 YEAR OLED SON THAT I HALF FULL COSTY OF AND I AM RETIRED FROM THE US ARMY IF YOU ARE INTERSTED PLEAS SEND ME YOUR PICTURE HOPE TO HERE FROM YOU SOON MY NICK NAME IS BOB


HI MY NAME IS STEVE ,I AM ORIGINLY FROM CASABLANCA (MOROCCO)BUT I LIVE IN UNITED STATE,I AM A SINGLE FATHER WHO IS LOOKING FOR A GREAT WOMEN TO SHARE THE REST OF LIFE WITH.
THATS MATTER HOW SHE LOOK LIKE ,BUT MUST BE GOOD HEART,LOVE KIDS AND TRUSTFULL .
AGE NOT IMPORTANT

Russian women are so wonderfuly beautyful. I just wanted to say that. I wish I could find a grate woman from there to settale down with


OH HOW SWEET! first of all these kikes think they can charm a woman into marrying them when they can't even realise that NO ONE AT ALL KNOWS WHAT CRAIGSLIST IS IN RUSSIA! they should put up an ebay ad and they would get more lookers! then they type everything in CAPSLOCK like that's gonna help! how is this russian beaotty going to look up these words in the dictionary like, marrie, originly, beautyful! these are crucial strategical points in their bewitching siren songs!


look at any celebrity gossip site! all they do is talk about how paris hilton has cellulite to belittle these people, like paris hilton isn't fucked enough they have an entire article describing a blown up picture of her stupid leg. then some waste of skin like  kevin federlin who looks like a bloated testicle is on the site and they just say "oh this guy is a dumb guy, also kinda fat, no?" what? he is the most useless fuck on earth! they have kanye west on there who is a total retard and they can't even think of any good jokes about his mr. potato head face but then they have a story about how one of katie holmes' boobs is weird looking! that's a story! i saw on stars: they're just like us in whatever awesome magazine that's in where a girl was wearing a sandal and her pinkie toe popped out and looked funny! that was it! wow weird toe! no wonder i think constantly how fat i am when i weigh 125 pounds! men maybe retarded and fucked and ugly and wear rainbow refelcctive shades and push their fat arm in such  way that some might be fooled into thinking it's a muscle, but they sure have females thinking they need to be a slut to get a job and wear vag spray so sick fucking dogs don't sniff their crotch and listen to whatever fat negass oprah says about getting rid of belly flab!

it has gotten to the point where men actually think they are so superior that because they ride a harley and can type on the computer 4 words per minute (still havent found the capslock button though) that a russian woman will date them because women are so worried about their age and cellulite that they'll take what they can get. of course all these men want women 20 years younger than them because a woman within 10 years of their age would probably have a flabby ass and that would be UNACCEPTABLE!
god! yall know i am not even a feminist but i guess i am because i just said all that shit! sorry gotta go lift some weights and drink creatine and talk about tits! see ya!